After his mother had another child two months ago, four-year-old Kaikai insisted his little brother be named "Duoduo," meaning "extra."
No longer the only "little emperor" of his family, Kaikai has to share his favorite toys and often wakes up from his brother's crying at night. The boy can't hide his resentment.
"I don't like him, but I can't bully him because he's my brother," Kaikai once told his parents when they found him hiding under a quilt, crying.
Kaikai's pain astonished his mother, Zhang Weihua, who hadn't expected sibling rivalry to be a problem. Most parents worry about housing and education costs when planning for a second child, but for a generation of parents raised as only children, raising siblings in harmony has emerged as an unexpected challenge.
NO LONGER THE FOCUS
"I'm the emperor of my family. How can I allow another child to dethrone me!" said 11-year-old Xiaoxiao, a fifth grader in Beijing, when she learned that having a second child would no longer require approval from the family planning authority.
Fear of losing parents' love is widespread among kids who have been showered with attention as only children.
A primary school in south China's Guangdong Province asked its third-graders to answer a question on a recent exam: "What would you say if your parents told you they hope to have one more baby in the family?"
The answers came in various forms, but all carried the same general sentiment: "Please don't."
"Mom, I don't want you to go through a cesarean section, it's too painful," wrote one student.
"Raising another child will cost too much money. You will have a lot of pressure," wrote another.
Some even worried that their parents wouldn't save them from danger."Because even if I die, they still have another," one wrote.
Older Chinese people born before the one-child policy have been shocked by the response.
"Siblings ought to look after each other," said Pan Guanghe, who was born in southwest China's Sichuan Province in the late 1950s, when material scarcity and an exploding population were the norm.
Pan, who has four siblings, remembers having to help his sister cook for the family at the age of three. As he grew older, he naturally shouldered the responsibility of taking care of his younger brother and sister.
The big family struggled, and Pan's younger sister starved to death during the great famine years in the early 1960s. Pan was sent to the countryside as his parents could not afford to raise him.
Big families became rare after the late 1970s, when China started strict implementation of a one-child policy to cope with increasing population pressure.
REVIVAL OF "SIBLING EDUCATION"
To alleviate Kaikai's worries, his mother, Zhang Weihua, tried her best to assure the child that her love would never change or decrease.
At the same time, Zhang also encourages Kaikai to help change diapers and play with Duoduo.
Gradually, she has noticed some pleasant changes. Instead of giving Duoduo the cold shoulder, the first thing Kaikai does when coming home from kindergarten is to kiss his younger brother.
Cong Zhongxiao from China National Children's Center said the essence of sibling education is to encourage sharing and love.
"The resentment and conflict are not congenital. How the first child responds to the new baby depends on how parents respond and teach. The only way to remove their fear and upset is for them to feel they are loved and enable them to love others," said Cong.
Beijing TV just debuted the reality show "Second Child Time" to portray parent-child interactions after a second child is brought into the family of a celebrity. The show topped audience ratings for 2016 new programs.
"The show is very enlightening. Single children were spoiled in families," said a comment by a netizen with the screen name "Cindy_nick."
"We only children didn't value sharing that much. But from this show, we find growing up is no longer lonely. Siblings are people you can share sorrow and happiness with," said the comment.
According to an old Chinese saying, an elder sibling should befriend the younger, while the latter should respect the former.
Xia Xueluan, professor of sociology from Peking University, said the two-child policy will help future generations revive brotherly love and get back to the traditional culture.
