Westernized-Chinese
According to Bai, one-third of his clients are Chinese people seeking a foreign flatmate. He said within that group, the majority are persons who have either studied overseas and are already used to the Western culture and lifestyle, or who work for international companies and enjoy a multicultural environment.
Max Liu, 25, a Chinese who studied at Dartmouth College in the US for five years, currently has an American flatmate. "I chose to live with a foreign flatmate because I think people with an international background have more to talk about because we both lived abroad."
Liu, who describes himself as "already used to the Western culture," said one advantage of having a foreign flatmate is the expansion of his world view through new friendships formed with his flatmate's friends. The other, is having someone to go out and have fun with.
"Most local Chinese don't like to go to bars because they think it is noisy and not safe," Liu said. "And when they do, they would just sit in a booth with their friends and force each other to drink, rarely mingling with other unfamiliar people like they do in the US."
Chen Qiuping, 35, a software engineer in Beijing, has had flatmates from countries including France, Spain and Mauritius. She said exposure to different cultures gave her an alternative perspective on life. Unmarried, Chen was dubbed a "leftover woman" by her parents. Like many single women over 30, Chen said she used to be afraid that she would never get married, that is, until she realized that other cultures do not place a time limit on marriage.
"My French flatmate's free spirit in love made me realize that it's normal for people not to get married at a certain age," Chen said. "[I now understand that] I shouldn't hurry. Instead, I can just follow my heart and enjoy love and life."
Narrowing the culture gap
Eating dog meat is just one of the culture differences cross-cultural flatmates have to face.
Bai said that in his experience, he usually gets complaints from foreigners saying that their Chinese flatmate is not hygienic enough, and they don't clean shared spaces like the kitchen and bathroom. While his Chinese clients often complain that their foreign flatmate comes home late at night and often hosts parties at home, which interrupts their sleep.
Even so, some foreigners said their Chinese flatmates are more friendly and attentive than foreigners.
According to Robinson, when he lived with Western flatmates, they had mostly kept to themselves, not worrying about how the other is doing. "My Chinese flatmate, however, constantly worries about whether I'm eating enough food, and generally acts like I am her grandson," Robinson laughed.
Both expats and Chinese have found that the cultural differences between them are narrowing due to their gaining a better understanding of each other's culture and lifestyle.
Respect is key to a peaceful cross-cultural living arrangement, said Bai.
"Ask your flatmate's opinion before inviting other people over, keep the shared space clean, and keep an open mind. Also, know that there are different ways to do one thing and that just because you don't know something doesn't mean it's not right," Bai said.
According to Tebow, whether you and your flatmate can get along does not depend on your ethnicity, but rather on the people involved and good relationship skills.
She said before deciding on becoming flatmates, the individuals should talk and create a mutual understanding of how living in and sharing a space will look.
"Identifying deal breakers like what you can't stand. For example, my deal breakers are [being a] slob and no sleep over boyfriends," Tebow said.
She also suggested it is important to talk about things that bother you right away to find understanding and a solution before they get out of hand.
For Robinson, knowing his Chinese flatmate is not a party person, he will think about her before inviting anyone over.
"I invited my old New Zealand friend around to dinner last week and asked if she was OK with that, and if she wanted to join. In the end, she cooked for us," he said. "I think it doesn't matter where you're from, nowadays people are more alike than different," he said.
