Matchmaking events are held in many cities, but many are only attended by parents looking for potential spouses for their children
Good looks, hukou household registration, fertility are among the qualities most valued by parents
The ancient tradition of arranged marriages has continued until today as seen in matchmaking TV shows
People read about potential spouses at a matchmaking event in Shijingshan, Beijing. Photos: Li Hao/GT
Both holding placards highlighting their single daughters' most attractive qualities, one desperate mother said to another, "If I had known she would not find a boyfriend, I would've never encouraged her to study abroad."
This conversation took place in a corner of Zhongshan Park at the center of Beijing, next door to the Forbidden City. Every day, groups of concerned parents with unmarried children gather in the park, using the public space to display their children's information, in hope of making a suitable match.
Walking around the park, one can see cards that read "stable job," "Beijing hukou (household registration)" or "no bad habits."
They also listed what attributes their children - or they - want in a spouse: kind, good-looking, can take care of a family. One card reads "Anyone born after 1986 is okay, but not the year 1988," because the mother was afraid of a zodiac clash between year 1988 and 1982, when her son was born.
Speed dating on TV
Parents choosing spouses for their children is an ancient phenomenon. In dynastic China, marriages were arranged by parents and professional matchmakers based on the two families' wealth and social status.
In fact, it has retained such popularity that it has even made it to national television.
In December, a dating show started to air on Shanghai-based Dragon TV. The show, named Chinese-style Dating, has the slogan "once you become married, you bring honor to your whole family."
The show invites five unmarried men and their families on stage on some episodes, and five women and their families on others.
In the first episode, the bachelors and their families sat in different rooms. Then each potential bride came on stage to be judged and questioned by the families, while the men could not see them. The women in turn asked their own questions about the men without seeing them.
The first man came on stage with his mother and aunt. During the introductions, his aunt said that a gift for domestic work is the best quality of a wife. Another 23-year-old man came with his mother, who is a nutritionist. She explained she wants a daughter-in-law whose hands are warm, because "women with cold hands might have problematic wombs, leading to problematic children."
Then the show had the female guests come on stage one by one. Out of them was a beautiful woman who owns a soup restaurant and knows how to cook. After hearing about her culinary skills, all the men grew excited. But after she revealed she's divorced, 40 years old and a mother, they all fell silent.
The nutritionist mother immediately rejected the woman, saying, "My daughter-in-law should give the family two to three children." Her 23-year-old son insisted on picking the woman, and the mother then said to the woman, "You are 40 … 40-year-old men are very popular. How can you guarantee that you will still have control over my son's heart in 10 years?"
Ironically, the show was hosted by Jin Xing, China's first transgender talk show host. She recently spoke at the Davos forum in January about her experience of transitioning.
But some argue her views concerning women have always been quite outdated.
Yansubagua, a WeChat public account that publishes daily news and discussions of celebrity events with a feminist slant, once wrote an article saying Jin's views are gender discrimination disguised as sharp-tongued comments. Jin described Wendy Deng's divorce as "being kicked out of her family." In past interviews, Jin has told media she's quite traditional and said women should follow the old ways and obey their men.
