Looser family planning causing jealousy between siblings

Older children have been known to act negatively toward the arrival of younger siblings, in what experts have called firstborn syndrome. Photo: Li Hao/GT

As her eyes burned with rage, 4-year-old Beibei (pseudonym) kicked her little brother right in his belly. The 1-year-old baby flew back against the wall behind him with tears in his face, as Beibei burst into laughter.

Their mother, 35-year-old Pang Juan, was horrified, confused and afraid. "Beibei has been like this ever since her little brother was born, she has changed from a shy and docile little girl into a violent person full of hatred," Pang said.

"She seeks out every chance to hit her little brother, she even starts fights with her classmates from kindergarten, I really don't know what to do now."

Chen Zhilin, a psychologist and education expert based in Chongqing, said that this kind of behavior is more common than people think. It is often a reaction from an older child to a new arrival in the family, when their role as the only child has changed.

"Beibei is worried that her parents do not love her as they used to because the new baby came along, so she turned to violent behavior to attract her mother's attention," Chen said.

Family planning changes

China's family planning policy, instituted in 1979, meant that outside of certain minority groups, most families were only eligible to have one child. It was not until 2011 that China allowed couples who are both the only children in their respective families to have a second child. In 2013, in an effort to combat the aging population, the policy was eased again, meaning only one of the two members of the couple must be an only child to qualify for a second child, according to a report by the Xinhua News Agency in September 2013.

Since 2013, more than 700,000 couples around the country have filed applications to have a second child. Among the newborn babies born before May this year, around 30 percent are the second child in the family, according to a report in the Zhengzhou Evening News in November.

In the report, Xia Xueluan, a sociologist from Peking University, said that the three decades of the family planning policy had made Chinese children grow up without the company of siblings. This, combined with the fact many parents spoil their children, led to many of these children to become both lonely and self-centered, a condition some experts are calling "firstborn syndrome."

Because many Chinese parents are overprotective, their children don't get enough interaction with the outside world, so most of their emotional attachments are fixed on their parents, the report said.

"They have become used to being the only child in the family and accustomed to getting all the attention and care from the other family members. A second child, who threatens their position, could provoke psychological resistance from the firstborn," Chen said.

"Around 50 percent of couples from the post-70s generation (those born after 1970), who have a second child, have found that the older children have shown various signs of this firstborn syndrome," Chen said.

Recognizing symptoms

Chen points out that this "firstborn syndrome" can manifest in a variety of ways.

He said that it can be even worse when the firstborn child is already an adolescent, as they may be going through a rebellious period, which can be exacerbated by the arrival of a new baby in cases where there is not enough communication with the parents.